1 Drop at a Time

The holidays are winding down. My rather large fluctuations in BG readings are leveling off and I'm looking to the new year with anticipation.  A year ago, today, Osman and I were nervously killing time, waiting to go in to be induced. We had a fancy lunch, walked around the mall. I was so excited to see the boy I'd been carrying, but so sad to have to share him with the world. It was definitely one of the most contradictory times of my life. I went into labor with the hope that all the blood sugar testing and fretting would come to an end, as gestational diabetes is supposed to "go away" with birth. I remember being thrilled to see "regular diet" on my discharge papers. I indulged in pizza and birthday cake for days after Jake's birth.   But reality set in with my HgbA1C was pre-diabetic and fortunately I was blessed with a hyper-vigilant OB doc who referred me to an endocrinologist, who ran the tests and said I would become type 1, but was in the "

I had an appointment with my endocrinologist, yesterday. My A1C was 6.4, I was sure it was going to be over 7 with the MANY errors I had during the trial and error phase of setting up my pump. So I was pretty excited when the nurse told me my number. At my appointment, I felt like I had a mini graduation. I don't have to go back for another 3 months, and I don't have to check my post-meal blood sugars, thanks to my Dexcom. I was so excited yesterday, but now, I feel super anxious. My security blankets are being ripped away from me! However, I remind myself I have my doc's number pre-set in my phone, and if I get too concerned, my BG is only one stick away. Then I stop and think of everything going on in the world, and all the trails I have with diabetes. It is all just a drop in the bucket. We have had 2 mass shootings in the US within weeks of each other. So many people won't get to spend the holidays with their families, they would probably give anything to deal

Well we survived our first, low-carb thanksgiving meal and it actually went really well! My brother-in-law didn't even realize he was eating cauliflower mashed potatoes! Win! We celebrated Thanksgiving, today, so this post is coming to you a little late. Our menu included:  -Turkey  -Cauliflower Mashed Potatoes* -Brown Fried Rice* -Green Bean Casserole  -Sweet Potato Soufflé* -Mixed Green Salad with Granny Smith Apples walnuts, blue cheese & dried cranberries tossed in a lite balsamic vinaigrette  -Rolls  Pumpkin Pie* Pecan Pie Peanut Butter Pie* * low(er) carb  Cauliflower Mashed Potatoes and Peanut Butter Pie recipes can be found in earlier post. So I tired out some new recipes and stuck with some old faithfuls. My mother-in-law and brother-in-law made some super yummy fried rice that was low sodium and lower carb thanks to the jasmine brown rice and their talent in Asian cuisine. I'm not even going to attempt to recreate what those

Hi all! I find that I write when the sun shines again. Yet again, Athens felt like it was going to float away but fortunately ol' sun is out and shining. Tomorrow is World Diabetes Day. I am anxiously awaiting a short film, the @thebetes created, called, #Type1Day1. It is sort of surreal because this time last year, I was pregnant and struggling with managing gestational diabetes and had no idea this community or day existed. What a difference a year makes. I'll be at work tomorrow, more than likely sharing this day with people with diabetes, but I wish everyone a day of community, and the hope that maybe one day, a cure will come. As I reflect on this past year, I can say I have come a long way but I know I have so much to learn and live.  The other day, I posted a picture on Instagram of a near perfect trend (at least for me) and I felt oddly guilty. Recently, my numbers haven't been anywhere close to that and I've been hovering around the 200's. Yuck. I hate

Hello interwebs, I'm still around. The past couple of weeks have been an emotional and physical struggle. My mind was filled with immense feelings of doubt. My blood sugars were high, low, in the valley and up at the tip of the peak. It was awful. I would get low and overcorrect, then, be high and feel like crap. I felt helpless. My doctor suggested I read the book "Pump Life". This has been a life saver and so was Osman, my husband. On the days I was in tears (like the ugly cry, which was every day for two weeks), wanting to throw this pump I was so excited about, out the window, he would research the issues I was having. It is amazing how two people can read the exact same thing but read something completely different. So what have I learned? 1. It is okay to cry and feel mad.  2. Fast acting insulin is NOT fast acting....I now bolus and wait anywhere from 15-30 minutes to eat. It was SO scary because I felt like I was going to bottom out and not be able to get my

I have a pump! I know in time it will be great, but right now, it makes me feel a little uneasy and unsure. It is hard to let go and trust a little box, but technology is a wonderful thing that I am thankful for. Currently, I am working through finding the "perfect" basal rates and insulin-to-carb ratio. I'm quickly learning this isn't something that happens overnight. That being said, the t:Slim G4 is quite the device. I talked a little bit about it in my last blog, but here is some updated info. The touch screen makes it user friendly, especially in this smart phone world we live in. The pump walks you through most steps, and security measures are in place so you don't "butt bolus" on accident. T:Slim and Dexcom (continuous glucose monitoring) came together to provide an integrated system that empowers you to make better choices, thanks to the ability to see your glucose levels in real time. I didn't say blood glucose levels because the Dexcom port

The sun is finally shining again!! We have literally gone DAYS without any sunlight. We missed the blood moon thanks to the clouds, but thank heavens there is good ol' sunshine again.  For the past couple of weeks I feel like I have been making a complicated electronic purchase. When in reality, I have been deciding on what insulin pump and dexcom (continuous glucose monitor) I would like to commit to. Things I have learned  1. If you can have medical equipment processed through the pharmacy portion of your insurance, DO IT! I learned that only some medical supply companies do this and other companies can only process through the medical portion of insurance, which requires deductibles to be met etc. So instead of paying hundreds to thousands of dollars to have my pump set up, my copay contains only 1, zero!!!  2. There are a TON of options out there.  3. All those options can be really over whelming.  4. I'm scared. With all that being said, I decided on the

Hi there,  Fall is officially here. My favorite season has arrived and Athens seems to have gotten the memo with the cool air and overcast day. In honor of all things Fall, I thought I'd share one of my favorite, low-carb dessert recipes. Osman found this recipe and since, we have tweaked it some to fit our taste.  Peanut Butter Pie  Ingredients: Filling -1 cup Peanut Butter  -8oz Fat Free Cream Cheese  -1/2-1 container Lite Whipped Cream  -1 teaspoon Vanilla Extract -Splenda to taste (they say sugar substitutes are cup for cup the same as sugar, I have found Splenda is overly sweet so I only use 2-3 tablespoons for this recipe) -Cinnamon  -Nutmeg  Crust (entire crust is only 11g of carbs!!) -2 cups Almond Meal -3 tablespoons melted butter  -3 tablespoons Splenda  To make the crust, pre-heat oven to 350F. In a bowl mix together almond meal, melted butter and Splenda. Take mixture and place in pie dish, press down with a fork or clean fing

My work week is over, yay! A couple days ago my dreaded medical alert bracelet came in the mail, or what I thought was dreaded. I actually love it! It looks just like a silver bangle but it is a piece of jewelry that could essentially save my life. I found it on esty, cutcolorcreate is the business name, the bracelet was reasonably priced and customizable. I would highly recommend this product. It is made from aluminum and water proof! So for me, it was a trendy but practical option. This week was an exciting one. After many pros and cons lists and discussions with Osman, I decided to become a Baylor nurse or a nurse that only works Saturday and Sunday. It will provide me with a much needed weekly routine and the cherry on the top is getting to spend some more time with my little man, Jacob. It is funny how life finds a way of working itself. Especially when I don't get in my own way! Like I have said before, I am a self proclaimed control freak. I also have an appointment w

Hey Y'all!  Sometimes a girl just wants something starchy. So I jumped on the Cauliflower Mashed Potato band wagon. I know this was all the rage awhile ago. However, I just tried this out a few weeks ago, and after some tweaking, I thought I'd share my recipe with everyone. Once you add in all the goodies, it is hard to tell your are eating dressed up cauliflower.  *Ingredients* 1 Head Cauliflower  1 Pckt Ranch Powder  1 Small Carton Heavy Whipping Cream  Chives, chopped  Shredded Cheese  *Directions* Steam Cauliflower. Preheat Oven to 350F. Once cauliflower is soft, place in a food processor. Process cauliflower to consistency of your choosing, I like mine as smooth as possible. While the processor is running, add in Heavy Whipping Cream, this will help smooth out mixture. Add in Ranch Packet and Chives, mix well. Place in a casserole dish. Sprinkle some cheese on top. Place in oven for about 20 minutes or until top is browned. The baking time helps evaporate any excess moistu

This past week has been frustrating to say the least. It was my first week off orientation at work, we were short, and my blood sugars have been enjoying the 40's, 50's and 60's. I tried to think of a witty "even my blood glucose levels are ready for Fall" joke but I'm not feeling it. I'm so bad about communicating my concerns. For me, when my blood sugars are not "perfect" I feel like I'm failing. So instead of asking for help, I grin and bare it, shaky, sweaty palms in all, choke down a few deliciously, disgusting glucose tabs, reminiscent of glucose tolerance test, and bring that sugar back up. Remember, nurses make the worst patients, at least this one does. I think a lot of times, I feel like if I don't verbalize this whole area of my life, then maybe it will just go away. Well today, I decided to ask for help. I'm so glad I did. I'm fortunate to have a doctor who cares enough to personally call and talk with my stubborn self

On this day, 9 years ago, my life changed for the better. A rather tall, dark and handsome man walked into my life. Literally. I was working as a hostess at a restaurant and Osman was a guest waiting for a lunch meeting. He walked through the restaurant doors and we had no idea what the future would hold. We shared a pleasant conversation and parted ways. Thanks to good ol' Facebook and a mutual friend we started our daily correspondence. A few weeks turned into months, and months turned into years, and here we are, almost a decade later, still talking everyday. I'll probably embarrass him by writing this, but I cannot express how thankful I am for his presence in my life.  He has been the reasonable one when I get unreasonable about things. He is the researcher extradinaire when I become discouraged. He makes sure I wake up at 3 am to check my blood sugar. If  it wasn't for him, I  would be so lost in this phase of my life. So, Happy 9 years to my best friend for life. Tha

Sunday afternoons always seem to come too quickly. They make my heart ache a little, I feel like the magic of the weekend is fading and it is back to the realities, routines and rush of the week. Athens has some pretty great, local restaurants and we have been doing our best to try them all out. Brunch is my favorite, mainly because you can have coffee, but it always seems to be a little bit easier to choose lower carb options. Although, I do eye the person eating the GINORMOUS cinnamon roll and weirdly contemplate asking them if I could smell their breath. Once I get my personally calculated carb to insulin ratio (that sounds so Hoity Toity) I will eventually be able to splurge here and there, but until then, I will just admire from a distance.  I have a small favor to ask in this post, as I'm in need of some opinions. I use an insulin pen, it literally looks like a fancy ink pen. I attach a small needle to the end of it and it allows me to select a dose and inject. This is my di

Well it has been a week since Diagnosis Day. My goal was to get my fasting blood sugar under 110 and I succeeded this morning with an 86. Thank you Levemir! Funny thing is, since my fasting blood sugars have been running near 200, this cool 86 made me feel bad! Go figure. And this brings me to the topic of low blood sugar readings. They scare the living crap out of me. I am a control freak, and when I start to feel my fingers shake and my palms sweat, like they did on my first date with Osman, I start to get a little panicked. I haven't had any lows in awhile and I am beginning to realize how much the high blood sugars have been ironically nice. My biggest fear is that I will be with Jacob, pass out, and he will be left helpless and so will I. Which then brings me to the question I have been asking myself all week, "to get a medical alert bracelet or to not get a bracelet, that is the question...." Herein lies the rapid neuron fires of Meagan's brain: -Rememb

So as much as I would like to claim to be perfect, I am not. I'll be honest, I was a HUGE emotional eater. You can ask any of my friends, I love me some ice cream or some frosting from cake. I was one of those types that would eyeball the corner piece of a cake or the gloriously huge flower made out of frosting and it would straight up ruin my day if I didn't get that piece. "Oh, you don't like frosting you say?" Just scrape that goodness on my plate. As you can see, I had/have a problem. Well on Day 1, I had what I will call The Chocolate Buttercream Frosting Incident . Not my proudest moment but hey, like I said, I am no way perfect, and I had too much faith in the few units of insulin I had at dinner time. I was baking a cake and making chocolate frosting from scratch. Well one small taste, turned into "oh dang I got some frosting on my knuckle, can't let that go to waste." I kept justifying my little sneaks here and there. Well being a Type 1 D

 *Some slight profanity below, sorry mom*   "Oh sh*t" doesn't quite capture my emotions but it comes close. I have always wondered how I might die and it sort of feels like I have been handed a quasi death sentence. I am faced with this totally manageable but tough, chronic illness and I have to make a choice, will I   be a victim or a survivor? Of course I say "SURVIVOR," with the enthusiasm of a teenage girl at a pep rally, but this is before the doctor starts talking about the number of finger sticks I   will require, managing deathly lows and highs. I'm like dang, I'm a nurse. I'm supposed to take care of people with this, not be this. But am I this? Does this illness define me? A long pause ensues in my brain, my fingers stop typing-well kind of, I'm still typing but you catch my drift. I don't know the answer to this. I don't think there is a right answer and I don't know if I will ever be able to answer that question.

Hi There, I am having flashbacks to the days of writing cryptic Xanga posts about High School angst but in reality this is a little more serious slash I am writing in complete sentences and using real words. It is slightly unnerving to "put yourself out there" but I feel we all have a story to share. My story is one I did not think I would write, but then again, here I am sitting at the kitchen table, belly full of lunch and a small circular bruise on my stomach where I just gave myself some insulin. My new reality hasn't quite sunk in, Adult Onset Type 1 Diabetes. It is considered an autoimmune disease. Only about 10% of the diabetic world is considered Type 1. It isn't caused by the food I eat but rather my body just decided it didn't like my pancreas anymore. So slowly but surely my body is destroying all the glorious cells that once produced insulin. My body has done such a good job at destroying its own organ, that I now require synthetic insulin to survive