The Good, the Bad, & the Ugly Cry

Hello interwebs, I'm still around. The past couple of weeks have been an emotional and physical struggle. My mind was filled with immense feelings of doubt. My blood sugars were high, low, in the valley and up at the tip of the peak. It was awful. I would get low and overcorrect, then, be high and feel like crap. I felt helpless. My doctor suggested I read the book "Pump Life". This has been a life saver and so was Osman, my husband. On the days I was in tears (like the ugly cry, which was every day for two weeks), wanting to throw this pump I was so excited about, out the window, he would research the issues I was having. It is amazing how two people can read the exact same thing but read something completely different. So what have I learned?

1. It is okay to cry and feel mad. 
2. Fast acting insulin is NOT fast acting....I now bolus and wait anywhere from 15-30 minutes to eat. It was SO scary because I felt like I was going to bottom out and not be able to get my blood sugar up, but that never happened.
3. Basal rates and Carb Factors take time to adjust.
4. Glycemic Index is EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!

So I thought I was doing everything right, counting carbs, eating low carb. I knew about glycemic index but honestly, I didn't want to have to deal with one more number. Well, for tighter control and less unnecessary spikes followed by dreaded crashes, I needed to know this little tidbit. Basically, glycemic index is how much a certain food item will spike your blood sugar. It rates food on a scale from 0-100. 0 being no rise and 100 being a fast spike aka glucose tabs. Since being mindful of this number, I am happy to report there has been no tears since Friday and I finally feel human again. 

I'm humbled more and more everyday. I am thankful for the struggles that I face because they have taught me about so much more than diabetes alone. I definitely know I couldn't do it without the patience of my husband and the slobbery kisses and hugs from my son, my parents willingness to listen and ask how I'm doing, especially when my mom takes time to stay on the phone with me, when I'm low and nervous and waiting for my blood sugar to rise. They all help me to remember to take it 1 Drop at a Time. 


Stay tuned, I'm going to attempt to adjust some of my favorite Thanksgiving recipes and hope they don't taste like cardboard, I'll let y'all know how they turn out! 

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