Love is My Purpose

*Warning! These are just the random neuron fires of my mind. I think there are many paths to reach your purpose. I'm just feeling a little lost on that journey. Enjoy the rambles.*

"Love is the most powerful and underused force for change in the world." - Melinda Gates 

I FINALLY finished one of the most informative books I've ever read, The Moment of Lift by Melinda Gates. I honestly would do the book a disservice by trying to give you a quick synopsis of what contents it contains. Each chapter is as if you are traveling to another part of the world and witnessing a small glimpse of everyday life for other women and the challenges that most women in America would never face. That is not to say that many American women do not struggle with access to pre-natal care or contraceptive options etc etc However, I will say it was beyond eye opening, albeit life changing, for me to read her book. Promise, I am not trying to make this a political blog. What is also incredible is Melinda had the ability to make some really heavy religious and political topics humanized. She saw the humanity in so many situations. Okay, I'm just going to stop there because I am now summarizing the book. 

I actually wanted to write this post because after we moved here, I've felt so lost. The packing dust has settled, I've decorated, gotten some landscaping accomplished, I can get to and from the pool and gym without navigation, so here I am alone with my thoughts. Lord knows if you really know me, my thoughts are typically running a million miles a minute and that is without coffee. 

That being said, I'm typing this blog post after some iced coffee, bear with me. Basically, I have been wracking my brain with the question of " what the F is my purpose?" I won't lie to you, being a nurse is a HUGE piece of my identity, being a school nurse is an even BIGGER part of who I am, but for the next couple years, I'm probably not going to be a nurse of any kind. 

So as I was reading Melinda's book, I got to page 113 in this book and I come across her quote:  "Love is the most powerful and underused force for change in the world." and I said OMG that is it. My purpose has and will always be LOVE. 

I realized I don't have to be a nurse all the time to fulfill this purpose. As a nurse, I always hated inflicting pain on patients, what I treasured most was conversations, a glimpse of someone's humanity, the chance to see what they might be outside of the confines of their box of  a room. That is why I loved school nursing so much. I got to give and receive so much love. Nursing was honestly the first glimpse of what fulfilling my purpose looked like. 

So here I am living this new chapter of life, that I am so grateful for, and I realize that I'm going to have to find some creative ways to love. Of course I love my family more than they will ever know but I firmly believe that love should reach all corners. As Melinda says "love is what makes us one" as well as, "love is what lifts us up." It reminds me of my most favorite word, that one day I will get tattooed on my wrist, "ubuntu". Roughly translated this word means, "I am because we are." 

So in the meantime, I think my purpose is finding other ways to love. Maybe that means helping a neighbor, talking to a stranger, doing a little volunteering, loving planet earth by recycling or using reusable bags and produce bags. Maybe it means loving myself a little more than I have the past few months. Maybe it means expanding my experiences with type 1 diabetes. All I know is it was beyond freeing to realize I did not lose my identity or purpose by not working as a nurse for the next couple of years, rather I can take those experiences as a nurse and find ways to expand on that love. 

I will always be a nurse. It is just one of those professions you will never truly leave, but in the meantime, I'm learning how to expand my purpose. If you are still here with my ramblings, I'd love to hear what you think your purpose is? What is your path to get there? Feel free to comment here, on instagram or facebook OR send me a private message. 

I'll be taking it 1 Drop at a Time while I try to figure out this new path of life. Here is a link to Melinda Gate's book if you are interested: The Moment of Lift and a selfie just because.